Same Storm, Different Ships

[00:00:00] Rhonda: Hey guys, it’s Rhonda with Kentucky SPIN. I hope this message finds you well and healthy. We are the parent training and information project, PTI, for Kentucky, Kentucky SPIN, Kentucky Special Parent Involvement Network, and we all are persons with disabilities and or parents or family members of persons with disabilities helping one another.

We wanted to share with you all today a little segment that we’re calling. “Same Storm, Different Ship”. We had saw and shared on our Facebook page the picture of that from one of our friends who had shared it. And it really resonated with each of us. So we wanted to take some time just to share with you a little bit, about how, although we all are going through the same storm, our ships are different.

But the key here is that we make sure that we keep our ships going and afloat. And sometimes that can be [00:01:00] very challenging. One thing that, I guess when I get to thinking about that, and especially on a daily basis, not even counting the pandemic that we’re all going through, it can be very isolating as a family.

Many of us, the only natural supports that we have are within the house that we live. And not that other people don’t care about us, or love us. It’s just that is our support system. And a lot of services that you may have got, hopefully you’re able to get in an alternative way now. But it is very limited at that because we’re all having to be healthy at home.

So a lot of things have shut down. So maybe some supports that you were used to getting before the pandemic, has made us even more isolated and it affected us a lot. Because you know, we all have our hands full, all of us play an important role within our families. [00:02:00] I guess one thing that I struggle with, and I know people have felt this way for a long time, is that I need to learn to say no.

So I’m still a work-in-progress. I’m going to just be honest with you. But what I have found though, is that many things there is not an option. You do what you have to do as a family to get by and so that everybody could live their life to the fullest, greatest extent and live their dreams. So you do what you need to do to help your family.

So I guess what’s most important for me is that you not feel alone. That found myself stopping and thinking, okay, because nobody stopped asking for things too. And it actually has been amplified even more on top of everything we’re already handling because people know we’re the doers. That’s our role, whether it be at home, at work, in social setting [00:03:00] with friends, family.

That’s our role and we play a part in it. And I’m guilty, I set myself up, I’ll just be honest for a lot of it. But it does become very overwhelming now that things are even 10 times more amplified with the pandemic. So I want you to know that although our ships may look very different, you are not alone, and we’re all here to help one another.

There’s going to be good days and there’s going to be bad days. But find the moments even in your saddest, darkest times. Find the moments where you can laugh. laughter and listen I’m the first that can laugh at myself because laughter will get you through the toughest times in life. It may be you’re crying and then you start laughing.

But laughter can help greatly. So even though storms can be very rough at times, they bring great things with them as [00:04:00] well. And our growth through this, you know, and I’m not unrealistic and live in my own little world where everybody’s happy and happy all the time and things go perfect. The fact of the matter is they don’t, and the majority time, they don’t.

But like my brother says, if you can learn from it, that’s where the key is. And it will help you get through these difficult times. No, it’s not going to be perfect. And you know, we wish we could solve everything. Cause those are the things sometimes that we have the hardest thing handling is when we can’t fix it.

So please know that you’re not alone and my coworkers are also going to be sharing with you. But we all are in the same storm together, although the ships are very different. I want you to know that we’re all here to support one another. Stay safe. And I hope everybody is healthy and well, and we’ll talk to you soon. Bye. Bye.

[00:05:00] Kellie: Hey guys, it’s Kellie with Kentucky SPIN. Just wanted to talk to you guys for just a second about a segment we’re doing it called “Same Storm, Different Ship”. And, I guess really, I don’t have a whole lot to say, but I can say the one thing that definitely changed in our ship, which I’ve mentioned previously, is that I now have a two year old here, 24/7

So she’s not going to the sitter’s house. She’s not going to visit family, you know, nothing. So she’s here all the time. And that’s been quite an adjustment for me. So the one thing that I have found that is absolutely detrimental to my mental health as well as productivity throughout the day is to maintain a schedule.

I have talked to you guys about doing a brain [00:06:00] dump and some kind of time management and organization videos, but I can honestly say getting up early, having my own personal quiet time and then spending, you know, an hour or so folding laundry or putting away dishes or mopping or whatever the case is because I have a child here 24/7 that’s really the only time I can do that, is before my husband gets up and goes to work, before the toddler gets up and starts running around. And so that has been, one thing that has remained consistent and is really the only way, I think that I’m staying sane at this point is just because, you know, keeping a schedule is so important. Whether it is because of COVID-19 or because school’s out. Whatever the case is, I encourage you, [00:07:00] if you’re not maintaining some kind of schedule,  and even rest can still, you know help, you know can still fit in with a schedule. So just make sure that you don’t just let your household party, let your life fall apart.

Just do things every day that are important to you. So for me, my quiet time in the morning, maintaining a semi clean home at least, and then having scheduled work hours are extremely important for me. And like I said, my productivity and mental health. So, that’s where I leave you today and how I have kept my ship afloat.

But I would love to hear some feedback, I would love to hear how you guys are keeping your ships afloat. So if you feel like sharing, please do. And we’ll talk to you soon. Bye. Bye.

Stella: [00:07:59] Well, hey everybody, it’s Stella with Kentucky SPIN. I wanted to take a few minutes and hop on here and just talk a little bit about, everything that’s been happening now in our world.

In a brief way, but really I want to mainly talk about how we are all in the same storm, but we’re all in different ships. Because how this affects you, may affect me differently. For example, I have been able to work this entire time, because I do work from home. So none of that has changed for me, so I have not had to go through having to file for unemployment or not having a job or anything like that.

Now my children on the other hand, have been without a job. And so that has been very difficult for them. But not in the same sense that it may affect someone who their whole income has been taken from them. So the one thing that I’ve really tried to do through all of this is not judge anyone. Not say, [00:09:00] well, I can’t believe they’re doing it this way, or I can’t believe they’re doing that.

When I’m out and about and I see people shopping or purchasing things, maybe like plants. Or things for their yard, you know, I don’t look at them and say, well that’s not essential. Because I don’t know what is essential for them. So it’s real important that we remember that and not judge someone else based on the decisions that they’re making right now through this time of change and uncertainty that none of us have ever experienced before. The thing that gets me through though is consistency. Every morning I get up and I do the same thing that I’ve always done before we were going through a pandemic. I get up, I make up my bed, I fix my coffee, I take a shower, I get dressed, I put my makeup on and I go to work. And so that has been something that has helped me. My coworker does the same thing. That’s how it’s helped her is through consistency in her daily life. [00:10:00] And that’s what I encourage you, find something that is going to help you through this time. Whether it be get up every morning and make up your bed and start your day.

My other coworker does what she calls dumping. She dumps everything in her mind, writes it down before she can start her day. So we all have to handle and do things differently. But remember, we are all in this storm together, but we’re on different ships. So don’t judge someone because they may be doing it differently.

Okay. We’re here for you at Kentucky SPIN. If you need us for anything, please reach out. We have some wonderful resources on our web page and I encourage you to look at those. Thanks so much and have a great day.

Michaela: [00:10:45] Hi y’all. This is Michaela Evans with Kentucky SPIN. I just wanted to talk to you guys a little bit about a segment we’re calling “Same Storm, Different Ship”. And since all this COVID-19 has started, all this mess is what I call it, has started, [00:11:00] it’s changed life for everybody. Everybody’s doing things a little differently right now. And however you’re getting by or however you’re doing things, I just want to let you know that’s okay.

What this is look like for me, y’all. I was falling apart a little bit before COVID hit. I was just burned out, single mom. You know, I have a son with autism. All of that stress, and now you guys are feeling it too. And so COVID hit and everything was canceled. And, I know it’s been a really hard time for a lot of people.

You know, they’ve lost their jobs. Having to say away from family, but for me and my son, it was actually a little bit of a blessing. And sometimes I feel guilty saying that. But I know that all, even though we’re all in the same storm, everybody’s ship looks a little bit different. One of my favorite things since I’m COVID-19 has come about is telehealth services.

You guys its saved my life. My son has speech, occupational therapy, and behavior therapy all through telehealth right now. He also was being seen with the [00:12:00] Kelly autism program twice a week, and we’ve been doing that through telehealth. And it has been a lifesaver, just to get him on the computer instead of getting dressed to leave the house and having to find somebody to run him there while I’m working all day.

We have, through telehealth, working on his speech, OT and behavior therapy, it’s all now stuff that helps me around the house. He’s doing chores for the first time ever in our life, you guys. It’s been a huge blessing and I feel like his therapist and I get to connect much more than we did before with me being a working mom and. I have seen a lot of growth, a lot of change in him. And telehealth, it’s not a fight to get him to therapy anymore. It’s not a fight to get him through appointments or make sure that teeth are brushed or hair is combed. All those things that just regular 12 year old boys hate, you know?

But, it’s been a real blessing for us. There’s been so many things that are scary and that are bad. But I’m just one person, I guess, I like to try and look for the good things. And [00:13:00] so I hope you guys are finding little blessings in your ships wherever you are too and in the middle of this storm.

Ian: [00:13:06] Hey guys, it’s Ian here with Kentucky SPIN and we’ve been doing this series talking about the same storm but a different ship because the storm that has hit us all is this COVID-19. And we’re all trying to keep our ship afloat either kind of way that we can.

And so I want to share with you some different things that’s hit me as the storm has hit us all and has hit me specifically. And then I want to talk about some different things that I’ve done. So, how it’s hit me really is, just kind of not being able to socialize as much as I used to, not be able to even just going out and simply going in stores.

Like I know we have curbside and there’s all these different ways that we can still do daily life, but it’s just not the same as going in the store, picking up, something, looking at it and making sure it’s what you want. [00:14:00] That’s something that I’ll never take for granted again. Hanging out with friends, going out to places, restaurants, like all that stuff has been a huge adjustment. And so we have this influx of time in the house, right?

Whether it’s work, school, or whether it’s you know, we just have to be in our homes. Even in our spare time we’re in our homes. Some of the things that have kept my ship afloat, sorry, are learning a new skill. I mean I got a guitar actually before the outbreak, but now I’ve had much more time to practice on it.

Learn new skills on the guitar, and just keep playing and having fun while I’m in this quarantine. And kind of distract myself from what’s going on around me. And also with that, I would add, self-reflection, like kind of, we have this time, so much time to ourselves now that we [00:15:00] can kind of think through maybe some decisions we’ve made recently or just life in general, or just kind of take a step back and be like, you know, how has, I know we’re in 2020 but how has 2019 gone. You know, what are some things that I’d like to improve? What are some things moving forward that I want in the next one year, two years, three years, five years, maybe even 10 years. You know, just really some time for self-reflection and self-evaluation to figure out where you want to be, what you want to do.

And that is something, you know, with our busy, busy, chaotic lives, when it’s normal, you know, we can go everywhere and do everything. But now that we’re forced to be at home, it kind of gets you thinking and you don’t want to overthink too much, you know, but that’s something that has helped me to just kind of use this time to reflect and ponder and think about the future and think about the past.

And I think that’s been really helpful during this time and [00:16:00] really helped me map out what I want to do with my next five years. And it also, you know, as I mentioned before, the guitar. Those are two things that have really helped me keep my ship afloat. And you know, just working on music in general and playing with different things and try and do things and getting creative, right?

We all have to be creative now with, with the virus and all the limitations that brings. So being creative has been really helpful and try like dipping my toes in different waters and you know, just really try to experiment and use this time while we have it. Cause it won’t be here forever.

And so, in some ways it’s like changing our perspective or maybe just me changing my own perspective has helped me on the situation. And looking at, looking at the bright side that yes, we have all this time at our house, but we can use that time and be as productive as possible with that time. And so I encourage you to do the [00:17:00] same.

So hopefully this video was helpful and all the other videos that we’ve produced as well. As we’ve all talked about how we keep our ships afloat, and hopefully this helps you keep your ship up and running. And until next time, see you guys later. Peace.

Rhonda: [00:17:17] Hey guys, it’s Rhonda again. I hope you all have enjoyed the stories.

That my coworkers and I have shared about our same storm, different ships. I want to kind of conclude today talking about judgment. Many times people can be very judgmental. And we’re all human. We do it without even thinking. It seems though now with the pandemic, it’s getting even worse. So always think in your mind. And what I try to remind myself of is, before I jumped to a conclusion and I judged someone, I’m not walking in their shoes. I don’t know what they have to handle. [00:18:00] Many people that you see that you assume have it all together, maybe going through some very difficult times. So I think the more that we make a promise with one another, that we’re all going to do our best and not judge one another because although it is the same storm, our ships are very different.

And what I have to do to keep my ship afloat is going to be very different from someone else’s. So let’s all just keep that in mind and we wish you well and we’ll have a lot more videos to share with you all. Take care now. Bye. Bye.